My Gay Hideaway

I have not written for a while because I have been in hiding. I have been regrouping and taking stock not in rehab or a quiet country retreat but in the safety of the Gay World.

I decided to disappear into the Gay World after the ultimate act of desperadoness committed by moi, The Desperado. It began with the organisation of a date. Sounds simple and innocent enough? No no, not for The Desperado! First of all, I couldn't remember his name and had to ask him what it was, then I proceeded to get incredibly drunk, which resulted in me not really being able to recall any of the date. Then, my equally drunk friends turned up causing a scene in the middle of a very quiet bar (which I actually found quite funny, only someone sober would have been embarrassed). So we ended up back at his place where I proceeded to throw myself at him like some sex starved nymphomaniac. Classic desperado behaviour.

So, alas, the date started bad and ended worse! My first date in 3 years culminated in being naked with a virtual stranger. Oh! The shame! And so, the realisation dawned on me that I could not cope with the straight world. I wasn't fully equipped to deal with a date scenario having been in a relationship for 3 years I had forgotten basic etiquette.

The Gay World have helped me through. Going to the gay bar every weekend has been refreshing. It means you can stand on a podium waving a glow stick whilst pulling some of the most god awful rave moves not seen in public since 95 without the fear that the man of your dreams is standing at the bar with his mates laughing his ass off at you. It means you can make a complete arse of yourself and nobody cares, including you because there is no one to impress. It is just pure unadulterated fun!

Although, now I don't want to venture back into the straight world, it's scary and unpredictable out there and not nearly as colourful. I have decided to ease myself back in this weekend, daunting as it may seem, my time in the Gay World has taught me that there is nothing wrong with making a fool of yourself and that it's actually quite fun, a fact I always knew but just forgot. So as I make my way back out into the straight world I know my World of gayness will always be there to disappear into when things get tough.